Then don't trust them
by emilylouise
Summary: Set following Brax being stabbed, after the upcoming episode when Charlie admits that she doesn't trust her feelings for Brax and she shares a somewhat passionate kiss with Brax...what happens next?
1. Chapter 1

**Charlie **

The kiss, in a way, felt like every other kiss I had ever shared with him; filled with doubt that I was in evermore-dangerous waters. But it was also entwined with an undeniable raging passion that urged my tongue against his, made me wrap my lips ever closer to his. The reality of possibly loosing him was more than evident in my kiss. It hadn't even been months and yet the desperation to feel the flick of his tongue and touch of his lips was burning inside of me. However, no matter how furiously he kissed my mouth back, I realise now, that the desire I feel for him may never be solved, never satisfied. It's that powerful, that uncontrollable.

I press the back of my hand against my wet lips, dabbing him away as I walk out of the restaurant and realise this. I flick my eyes up to scan the prevalent area as I left him and Heath behind. I'm shaking; I can feel how much I want him in every tremble, and it only reassures me of how much I need him. The passion, it's infuriating. But it's also what drives me right back into his tight, strong arms every time I doubt my feelings towards him enough to walk away. Heath was only delaying the inevitable. It's as if nothing in this bay, in our worlds – not knives, brothers nor secrets - can stop it…us from happening anymore. I've never felt more out of control over something so real.

**Brax**

As soon as Heath turns his back, I run the tip of my tongue against my lips, taking in the last of Charlie's physical lapse towards me, that lingers on mine still. Heath looks back towards me shaking his head, in disbelief, anger…and I look perhaps too longingly at the window. I try and look brazen, unscathed by the event. But to be honest, I didn't need this confrontation, not now. My mind, my whole body was completely taken by the one woman who had walked so easily out of this room. Even Heath, despite how much I tried to hide it, could see in my eyes what Charlie hadn't looked back to see: _I want you back too. _

I should have taken her into the back room when she arrived. I knew what she was here for. I knew what she wanted to discuss. I can see her bright eyes, even now, hear the quiver in her voice. And instantly I can taste her on my lips. Longing. An emotion we all love to hate, _right_.

**Charlie **

"Where's Ruby." He asks urgently, pushing himself through the doorway.

"Why?" I look round to him, searching his eyes for details. But as I stare at him, I am unusually calmed by his glare. I swallow all my doubt, more nervous now than I was when I confronted him not an hour ago. Instantly, I know why he is here. I push the door closed, feel the click of the lock. I step forward, my gaze dropping from his flickering eyes to the floor, and I swallow hard. He takes my hands in his, his large warm fingers covering and caressing mine with ease. He calms me, right there. I move even closer. I can hear, feel his hot nervous breath. I lift my head, the tip of his nose brushes my forehead gently. And before I can guide us together, his mouth embraces mine, covering my lips completely, swallowing me whole in a passionate tight grip. We break apart seconds later only to crash back together, his tongue surging forward in my mouth searching for…what? Reconciliation? Forgiveness? Or just lost time.

I give into him, standing up against his body, wrapping my arms around his neck, holding his head in my hands as he maneuvers to the left to slide deeper inside me. I sigh softly and he groans as the kiss breaks into a stiff embrace. His strength, his lust lifts me off the ground slightly. I can feel his mouth open against my neck. I can feel the heat in his hands seeping through my top.

"I mean it." he whispers at first. "I love you…"

**Brax**

Initially, she doesn't move in my grip after I admit what we have both know for so long now. I pause. I feel ridiculous for a moment. Self-doubt. Eventually, her long arms tighten around me in response, another gentle sigh from her lips as she relaxes into my body more. Unable to get any closer, and urgency only continuing to build, in a flurry I lift her off the floor completely, and sweep her quickly out of the kitchen and towards her room. She bends her head into my shoulder, and the smell of her hair sweeps through me like fresh air. I put her down for a second, our indifferent bodies stumbling over each other a little. I steal a kiss. It's brief and innocent. I reach in again, catching her off guard, and lock my lips against hers. She is breathless when I finally let her go this time. I wait to catch her eye, and she shyly looks up at me. Her hands finger my shirt, creeping upwards, as if deciding where to pause. Our eyes remain locked. Her fingers slide against my pecks and gradually peel back the corners so that her skin momentarily graces mine. She closes her hands around my neck and I feel my pulse quicken in her palms.

This time she draws me in for a deep dark kiss. Like in the restaurant, her tongue slides in first. I have to swallow a groan. I pull her waist against my tight trousers, I feel her grin through her kiss. Back where she belongs? I pull her tighter against me, and her tongue sinks further into my mouth. Back where she belongs.

**Charlie**

With one swift movement, he sinks his hands down each side of the waist band of my pants. He pushes his palms round, holds my buttock in his hands, and pulls me roughly against his hardening pants again. "Brax." I gasp into his mouth. He takes hold of my moment of weakness, and pushes his tongue through his lips. I swallow against him deeply. I begin to tear with my hands at his shirt. He's stronger though, and carries me into my room. I climb up around his waist, my legs wrapped around his back. He closes the door behind us. I tug my top over my head with a groan. Brax helping. "Brax." I whisper again. He lies me gently on the bed and stands up over me to pull off his shirt, staring at me with watery grey eyes and an urgency that matched the one I felt deep inside me now.

I had forgotten. In this moment of unadulterated passion, desperate for our connection to be remade here, now, I had forgotten. I push myself up with my arms, and break our gaze. He stands over me still, even as I reach out with my hand and gently caress his raw scar with my finger tips. He's a man, he doesn't flinch. But the wound burns my fingers. I lean in and kiss with my lips the defining moment that changed everything for me.

**Brax**

She could heal me. I tingle beneath her kiss.

I hold her shoulders lightly in my hands as she moves away from the stab wound, and looks up at me with a look that could break me. I guide her back, and I slowly follow. I lie over her, brushing the hair from her face with big clumsy hands, and kiss her over and over again. Her hands stroke my back. And we lie here for a moment; her small body breathing beneath mine. As if conserving energy. Gradually I move down, leaving the trail of kisses on her neck glistening as I fall between her breasts and trace a line down her stomach. Her fingers glide through my hair as I work down one arm, relieving the strap. Then the other. But she pushes me, as if unsatisfied, and rolls over me unhooking the bra herself. She straddles my waist, sitting up and the bra falls away. She watches me, watching her. She smiles, and rolls her eyes. She unbuttons my pants and I smile back.

**Charlie**

As I unbutton him, eager to feel a thinner layer of fabric between us, his hands spread against and hold my thighs. He slides them up to my pelvis, and with wild expertise, his thumbs flick underneath my panties. I am suddenly frozen to the spot. With synchronicity, he draws circles with his thumbs against me, watching me with wide eyes as his thumb movements widen until he breaches my lips and slides slowly up and down my moist skin. Unwilling to let him see for a moment, I bow my head in ecstasy, with a smile. "Like that." He asks, simply. I hear the smile of achievement on his lips. I don't gratify him with an answer. He pushes harder with one thumb and slides ever so briefly inside me. I can't help but groan, rolling my neck round and then quickly lie down over him, his hands forced to abandon their delightful post. I graze his lips lightly with my tongue.

"Take them off." I mutter against his lips. He obliges and uses his hands so that his jeans drop to the floor. I settle myself over him, rocking my body from side to side. Our underwear is our only barrier of safety for now. I can feel the heat of my body oozing through the fabric. I slide my hand down the front of his boxers and close my fist around his hard length. He squints in a familiar fashion. Something I realise only now I have missed. I smile broadly and continue.

**Brax**

I can't have this. And with one swift motion I roll Charlie onto her back. I sit up, tall between her legs and bend them into place. I smooth my hands down her tanned thighs and this time reach for the waistband, drawing her underwear off. I expose her body to my eyes and feel my own body respond by hardening between my legs. I remove my boxers. I open her legs wider and watch as I slide fingers into her wet opening. She arches her back, as if in agony. But I know that look of lust. I know that groan of ecstasy. I steady her with a reassuring hand on her stomach, which she grabs with her own immediately, and threads our fingers together. I push deeper inside of her again and swear I hear her groan my name again. But I am in a world of my own here and I lean down to taste her in my mouth. Her round clit hardens against my tongue, as I work to remind her why _we_ work, why I have this gravitational pull towards her.

Her breathing has grown heavy, her legs tense every few seconds when she contracts against my fingers. I suck hard against her. She groans and tugs on my arm. Eventually I lean up, kiss her neck and then her mouth. I push into her body with two fingers, eager to keep the momentum going. She pants against my lips reaching to hold my cock in her hands. I lean up so she can.

**Charlie**

I massage his long length between my fingers. He's pulsing in my palm. I run the tip of my thumb around and over his sensitive tip. I sense his pain, his frustration. With what little energy I have in me, I force Brax to roll to his side and I slide down. I release him from my grip only long enough to cover the tip with my mouth and gently flick my tongue back and forth. He grows harder beneath my touch. I only grow more determined. I can feel his fingers getting tangled in my hair, his breath becoming more uneven as it escapes his lips. I slide more of him into my mouth and only now begin to suck against his hot skin. I use my tongue to tease him, alternating my patterns, my pace. One of his hands tenses on the back of my neck, his fingers gripping me ready to pull me away if he looses himself completely.

I push one of his legs back with my hand, and sink lower. I massage his balls with my other hand, finding the tense spot that if we were standing would have made his knees weak by now. The flexed knee slides down in response. I pursue my goal and swallow harder. His hand tightens into a fist full of my hair.

**Brax**

I pull her to me, however roughly. Without the niceties present before, she's on her back and I force my heavy torso on hers. She moans repetitively as my fingers work her, our bodies rising and falling together as we pant in unison, locked in this frenzy of heat that just emerged. I guide my body between her legs, holding her tiny waist in my hands, naturally careful not to crush her petite figure. I look up briefly, catching her eye that waits for me to lock our look together. We don't smile or breathe, there's no acknowledgement. That's not what this is. Usually it's a look that grabs us and binds us, right in that moment. Today is remembrance, and today I pause for a second longer before I thrust into her.

I collapse down into her chest, her tight walls inviting me deeper. I rock my hips, burrowing further. She stiffens beneath me, adjusting to my weight, my size, the movement of our bodies together. We quickly become entwined, her arms around me, mine under her shoulders, lifting her slightly so she can move with me. Her voice catches in her throat when I move between her legs. She places her feet against my tightened calves. Her hands dig into my buttocks, her way of regaining some control.

**Charlie**

I hadn't forgotten this. In fact, this is exactly what I had craved since. Perhaps it was the desperation to feel his hard cock inside again that had driven me to doubt that the desire I felt was real and not merely physical. It was this pure craving, so human and now, in his grasp, so unaltered, that I had hidden the fact that I hadn't experienced it before Brax. Totally lost in the realization that physical attraction was not a crime but an undeniable factor that led him and I to the point of unmentionable love, I urge him deeper, widening my legs, holding him tighter.

He works almost against me to bring me closer to the edge. He slips a hand between us and massages between my legs, searching for the one place he knows will bring me teetering to an early end. I gasp as he finds it and settles immediately.

**Brax**

I love that I know her. This woman. This beautiful woman. I coax her with my fingers, pounding deeper. She moans again. I push on harder. Her body contracts against mine so tightly that a wave of lust envelopes me and I loose rhythm for a second. I change my position slightly, leaning upwards. But she manages to pull me deeper from here, her opening tenses suddenly and I groan again. I wrap her up in my arms, burying my face against her shoulder, breathing in, smothering myself with her skin. I can feel myself getting lost in her ocean that floods my every sense. I reach between our bodies again and slowly find her clit. I rub her gently this time.

"Mm-m." she arches her back. I continue. "Mm-mh." I swallow a deep breath. I lift my head and begin to rock my hips more. I watch the frown in her face crease, her eyes closed tight, as I quicken my pace. Her lips, moist are irresistible and I touch them with mine. My open mouth lingers, exhausted, panting, against hers. Her tongue flicks out briefly to greet me. I thrust meaningfully once. She arches her back and I slide a hand into the small of her back. I hold her back in it's arch. I thrust again.

**Charlie**

He manages to fill every space. He swarms in my, around me…in my head, in my mouth. I can feel and taste him. I close my eyes tighter, wishing to stay in this agony forever, in a way. He thrusts again and I fling my arms around his waist. My hands fall limp over him, almost spent. Almost. He thrusts again, this time groaning. He seems bigger, stronger, somehow. His fingers trace and tap my body rhythmically against his pounds. I tighten around him once more and then in an impassioned moment I loose myself completely. I clamp his mouth in mine as I contract around him. Everything from the waist down tenses in spurts. I moan more, as he arches my back with his one hand and I feel him explode within me. He groans with a single thrust. I lift my knees slightly as I prolong this moment, my body still shivering in his grasp, his still bursting between my legs.

His fingers still stroke me. He lips begin to kiss me again. He slides away from me, but I tighten my legs around him. I hold him in my lock. I swallow and breathe again. My face is burning. I can feel the sweat on his forehead as he leans his against mine and opens his eyes against me. I smile, and I know he sees me beneath the fog and delight.

**Brax**

Her lips are almost sweeter now. And I bury myself in them, wanting to be deeper again. She's so warm, and I could stay here for the rest of today and then some. I nuzzle her nose with mine and she kisses me back. She closes her eyes, lost in an ecstasy driven daze. "I missed this. You." She says, the second I let my eyes drift closed, as if she knew. Still above her, lying on her, I sigh, a long worn out sigh. "I know." I answer, both of us hearing more than the two words I could manage.

Eventually, I slide one hand over one of her smooth shoulders, with a kiss, and one under and turn us into bed. Like a child desperate to be close, Charlie crawls into my torso. I watch with acceptance as she does, wrapping her into my chest. She slides her legs between mine. I enclose mine around hers. Her eyes closed, she wriggles deeper against me still. I kiss her forehead, tuck her head under my chin and bury my mouth into her hair line. I pull a blanket over us. Her fingers slide between mine as she pulls it up to her shoulders. And I hold her as our breathing steadies, as our bodies cool and our heat subsides, for a moment at least…

**Charlie**

And he holds me, so close, so tight, as if we will stay here until…


	2. Chapter 2

**Part II**

**Brax**

Her job has been on the line for a long time now. She's knows that. There's no denying that. Lying here, I can't figure out why Heath's comments are bothering me so much. Because I care more now? Or because the likelihood and inevitable consequences of her boss finding out are so much more real this time? Regardless of the reason, what Heath said in there earlier, it's rattled me. Do I _really_ care more now than I did at first? And when did this whole thing suddenly develop, suddenly become so dangerous?

She must be asleep in my arms. I can tell from her heavy body against mine and her slow soft breaths against my arm. Is this the first time she has fallen asleep with me? _No sleepovers. _Had we just breached a massive barrier she set down all those months ago for us? So many questions. I run my hand through my hair and sigh.

**Charlie**

He's not settled like he usually is, which I suppose is understandable given the build-up, the intensity of what just happened. Me, I'm completely adrift.

"Brax."

"Hmm, what?" He stirs, and shifts beside me. "Yeah?" I don't answer, I just reach out and take his hand from his head, entwine our fingers and bring it down to my lips. I kiss his warm hand, turning it against my mouth, nuzzling his fingers against my open mouth. He swallows and sighs. "Yeah?" he whispers again. I turn back to look into his glistening eyes, and instantly I am lost. I smile, still dazed, still warm from his touch, my limbs limp and exhausted. He turns his hand in mine, and places it against the length of my face, and looks at me. His thumb traces a line over my bottom lip. I open my mouth a little wider, his thumb slipping further into my mouth. Smiling, I close my teeth gently around the tip, flick my tongue over it. He smiles back, and moves in to place one brief kiss on my mouth.

**Brax**

"Still thinking?" she asks when I pull back and just look at her. I shake my head first, then answer with a convincing _no. _She squints, skeptical, of my words? Of me?

"Why now?" I ask, admitting defeat; I was still thinking. I lift my chin up slightly to urge an answer from her.

"What? This?" She asks. I nod in response. "I dunno…" she teases. She pushes me back and slides her naked body in one smooth motion over me, straddling my waist. I slip down the pillows slightly, and she sits much taller than me. Her long brown wavy hair spills down her back, cascades over her shoulders, frames her beautiful face. I open my mouth to speak, but she instinctively rocks her hips from side to side before I can, and a groan escapes my lips. 

"Alright…" I say, grabbing her in my arms and twisting her back down beside me, all the while thinking how this woman manages to have me at her mercy within seconds. It would have me on edge, if it wasn't her. She laughs softly as I tackle her, and hold her still in my grip for a second, staring down at her beauty. She looks innocently up at me.

**Charlie**

For a second, Tegan pops into my head. That's_ 'why now'. _But then I hear his actual question, the question that the cunning Darryl Brax _really_ asked me. _Why now. _I know what he's asking; what suddenly changed that made us realise, made _me_ realise, that I had completely fallen for him? Why now had we admitted it to each other and not before. I know the '_I love you' _was ridden with frustration and anger, on both our parts, and that so much has happened since, but it's like those words we said to one another and the last hour was this massive exposure of feeling that has been building up inside for so long. It's like we've held it at bay, held it back until now. _Why? _

"I don't know." I answer honestly, seriously for a moment. Perhaps we _were_ real. Perhaps it really had just developed out of nothing, out of sex, up to this point. He kisses my open mouth as I pause, his eyes never closing or losing their grip on mine.

His face breaks into a smile, his way of dealing with a sincere moment, that he probably can't handle – _like I can_?

"You sure it wasn't the thought of losing me to a stab wound," he grins, at that moment jabbing me in the side with his tickling fingers. He makes me squirm beneath his touch.

"Brax!" I reach to grab his hand under the covers, ticklish. But his fingers escape mine…

**Brax**

I move up her body with the flat palm of my hand. I graze her breast, twist her hardening nipple between my fingers. She arches her back. Her legs move beneath the blanket, pulling it and gradually exposing her chest and my hands covering her. Her tanned skin shines, and I look down to trace with my eyes the path of my hand; the contours of her ribs, the rise and fall of her breathing, the darken shades of pink that her nipple turns. I lean down and kiss her soft breast. I lead kisses up to the nape of her neck and then her cheek. She lets her head fall back in the crook of my arm. I kiss her soft lips.

"Sure," she answers, and I let myself hear some truth in her tone. I roll over her, above her. I can feel her legs shifting beneath me, and I settle comfortably between them. She strokes my shoulders. "It's good to be back…here," she adds. I let the subtlety behind her words sink in for a second. Then…

"Here?" I smile, and push myself down between her legs, the warmth spreading through me too.

"Mm." She smiles, a wide brimming smile, nodding as if I'm joking.  
>"Here?" I say again, reaching with eager fingers down between our bodies and slide between her legs, easily into her wet opening.<p>

"Brax…" she moans huskily.

**Charlie**

I'm still so turned on that I shudder as he brushes against me, and then his fingers fill me. As my back arches instinctively, he opens his mouth a little wider against mine and grins, satisfied. I can't help but smile back, my legs falling a little further open. I smooth my hands down his broad muscular back, letting my fingers fall up and down each ripple. I try to maintain control as his fingers glide in and out of me. "Tell me Charlie Buckton…" he mutters, his lips vibrating against my neck.

"Mm.." I manage.

"…how it feels…" his thumb traces the exterior of my raging clit and I gasp, my eyes rolling closed. "..to be so close…" he threads a row of kisses along my collar bone. After, for a moment, his lips are gone, but then he plants his lips directly on top of my open mouth, which gasps for air. His thumb at the same time presses harder against me, setting a rhythm of its own.

With all the energy I can find; "_so close to what_?" I tease, and hear a smile grow at the corners of his mouth.

"Hm, not working hard enough." He admits softly, and pushes another finger deep inside of me. I'm locked beneath his heavy body, his wriggling fingers, his forceful and trained thumb. His soft kisses…

**Brax**

She has this strength, for a woman, that even I don't understand. And it mesmerizes me, especially now, when she uses it in bed. She also doesn't know what it does to me. Right now, it makes me grow harder between her legs, more eager to be in her again. She must feel this too. But I hold myself back for a moment longer. And it pays off.

"Brax…" I wait. She reaches between our bodies, and closes her hand around my hard length, pulling me closer to her. "I'm waiting…" she says through a short moan. I position myself in a way that gives me full control, and slide inside her gently. Then, I pull out slightly, and push in again, moving gradually deeper. Her lips tremble. She watches me with glassy, tired eyes. Her tongue flicks out and wets her lips. I lean forward before it sinks back in her mouth and take it between my lips biting down, perhaps catching her off guard. I draw her wet tongue further into my mouth and suck her hard. I push deeper, beginning to move against her, around, inside her.

**Charlie**

It could have been hours rather than minutes since he was inside me last, that's how good it feels, how full I feel back with him. His weight is heavy, just perfect around me. I feel lost amongst him. His kiss is long, it feels dark and dangerous. Like I shouldn't know what to expect. But for once, that feeling is normal, home-like; expected. It's like I belong in that unknown now. His warm tongue surges into my mouth over and over again, writhing against mine. He has pace, control, energy. I am already spent beneath him, merely holding on as he moves above me.

And then the pressure starts building deep inside me. Like a familiar firecracker, fizzing and popping, ready to explode. He must feel me tightening sporadically around him, as he stops. His arms slide under my back, and lock. Still deep inside me, he lifts me up vertically and throws my back flat against the headboard. His hands support me, and I wrap my legs tight around his waist, pulling him closer. The change in position allows him to slide deeper, he shifts inside me. It's an agony I can barely take, I swallow a yelp. He groans as he thrusts again. I claw at his shoulders, my head bowing against his wide broad torso, giving in to him.

**Brax**

There's this one moment, where she gives herself to me. And as much as I adore the fight in Charlie, as hard as it makes me, her surrender is just as sweet. In my arms, up against me, right now, she's this tiny breakable thing. And I do just want to hold her, and protect her. But at the same time, I just can't get enough, this is what I've missed. Her. So I press her harder against the bed board.

Her legs drop from around me. She pushes me down, and I fall back. My large hands find her hips to hold as she rides down over me, and thrusts her body back and forth. She sits down hard on me, and rolls her body around in a big circle. I push my hips up into her, holding her down tight over me. She holds herself down too, letting her head fall back, her long hair swaying around my hands. I reach out, and draw a line with my fingers down the front of her chest, over her taught hard nipples. She opens her eyes, she licks her lips, a cheeky glint in her eye. She bites down on her bottom lip and leaning slightly forward, plunges down on me hard again…

**Charlie**

I spread my hands across his brazen chest, tracing a letter of his bold tattoo with one of my fingers. I claw at his heart, and then rest on his pecks. His tongue juts out, as if he is picturing my mouth on his, longing for my tongue to be close. He continues to follow every urge, moving up inside me. I can feel the burning rise in me again. I push on, leaning forward, loving the feeling of his body rubbing against me. He slides his arms around in the small of my back and locks his fingers together, holding me forward. Whilst holding me down, he drives his hips up, rising further in me. I close my eyes, swallow deep, my breath catching in my throat. He repeats this action, and his hard body brushes against my clit again, and again.

I rock my hips back and forth, catching myself every time. I hold myself up over him with locked arms pressed down into his pecks now, supporting myself. He leans up slightly and kisses my arm, just above the wrist. I roll my hips again, following the twisting burning sensation that grows stronger. I can barely control my gasps of delight as they roll into something more, and I start to contract steadily around him. His pace quickens, and I squeeze my eyes shut, riding out the wave…

**Brax**

I watch her grow limper above me. I feel her clamping around me. Her fingers claw my skin, her nails sinking into my body. And so I pull myself up quickly, sitting, with her on me, she groans with the change of position. I roll us back down on the mattress, her hair splayed out behind her head and move inside her again, setting a similar pace. She continues to ride out her orgasm. I draw out of her slowly. At the last second I push forward, slowly sliding further and further into her. I don't stop this time. I close my eyes, and as I lay my lips onto her neck, slipping into the hidden chasms of her, it's the final, stronger beats of her walls around me that make me come inside of her. I let it happen this time, just _experience_ each wave of passion as I rock gently inside this warm place.

I barely feel like I am connected to my own body, as it feels so deep, so connected to her. She lies completely still under me for a moment, then her legs loosen gently from around me, and drop down, limp, spent, to the side. I release my grip of her, and pull back to kiss her neck again. I settle against her collarbone, and swallow. She strokes my back and I lift my head, she plants a hand on the side of my face, collecting my look in her eyes. She's panting softly, her mouth open slightly. I kiss her, softly at first, but then, exhausted, I sink into her open mouth.

**Charlie **

Brax lies on me for a while. After a passionate consummating kiss, he tilts his head and rests it on my shoulder blade. He's heavy, and twice my size, but I like it. I am lost amongst him. I sink my fingers into his hair, stroke his head and nestle my forehead against his. He blinks up at me, but I watch as his eyes grow too heavy to bear. His forefinger twists a circle into my other shoulder, the only sign he is still with me. I reach up, take his hand in mine and draw his fingers to my open mouth. I kiss his fingertips, each one after the other. He forces open his eyes, I can feel him watching me. I rub his soft fingers against my full raw lips. I breathe in the taste of his hands. I place a smooch on the underside of his palm and lay it to rest over my breast. He leaves it there, still.

"I could do this all day…" he speaks, his words fluttering out against my bare chest. I laugh aloud.

"You're exhausted."

"No-o." He assures me, frowning a little to convince me. His eyes are closed, his breathing slow, his body collapsed over mine. I laugh again. "Okay." He admits, blinking open his eyes again. "Just give me a minute…" he persuades.

"You can have as long as you need." I say, rubbing the back of his hand, and place a kiss on his shiny forehead.

**Brax**

I can hardly feel my legs…and I know she's joking, but I also know this time, we're talking about more than sex. Okay…great sex. We're talking about a new relationship. A new start now we know where we stand. Now I know she wants me, and she knows I need her…


	3. Chapter 3

Apologies that it has taken me forever to add to this story. Time is my absolute enemy! Thanks for staying tuned for the next chapter though…I really hope you enjoy

Also – obviously, the Chax-filled episode, which this story was initially based on, turned out a bit different (I naturally prefer my version of the events) and so I have continued the story rather than followed the non-X-rated storyline on TV!

**Part III**

**Charlie**

The waves rush up onto the sand, and surround my ankles. I sink a little deeper. When I tilt my head right back, I can just see the stars beginning to blink back at me, dusk showing itself again. I smile to myself, like a teenager. Tonight, stars only represent one thing to me. Brax.

Today had been pleasantly different to how I had thought it would go. Yes, feeling so content now, it has a lot to do with sex – okay, really great sex. But it's more than that. Today was about making amends. It was resolution. Resolution however, didn't make the last few hours alone any easier to bear, following our dramatic reconnection. Right now, like a gravitational pull, I can't help but look back from the beach towards _Angelo's. _He was just there. Right now. Being warm and comforted by this thought is strange to me. Isn't it strange, how you don't realise quite how much you miss something – even a feeling – until it's right back in your life?

**Brax**

I can see her slim silhouette on the beach. I would recognise her anywhere these days. For a minute I let myself consider how many people I can say that for? It's like she's sketched into my brain. I check, she's the only one out there on the beach. Her hair blows up in a rare gust of wind. She paddles in a little further, further away from me. I quicken my pace, getting closer. I check once more that no one is following me or going to emerge from either side. I keep under the control the urge to call her name. Instead I watch her. She's completely unaware that anyone is getting close and watching the way her long bare legs lift her up as a taller wave crashes around her calves. She's so toned, that her muscles flex in an irresistible fashion as she leans up. I want to run my fingers in each crevasse, in every shadow of her skin. Her legs and arms, her neck is so tanned, that she shines with a radiance, a beauty that I didn't realise existed, until her.

From the second I left her, until now, when I can see her again, when I can almost feel her warm body pressed against mine again, I have felt completely exhausted. I smile to myself as I get closer, almost calmed that I can be near her again in this way. Is this what love is..?

**Charlie**

I check my watch, but I can barely see the hands it's so dark. I look up instead and let the smell of the ocean fill every corner of my lungs. I close my eyes and sigh. The warm sea air rushes around me, clings to me. I check my phone. Nothing. I begin to type a new message. '_Work faster…' _I stare at the words for a moment, and then delete the letters. '_The sooner you finish work…'_ I let my mind run away with how I could finish that sentence. But before I put thoughts into words, or loose my nerve…

"Hasn't anyone ever told you not to walk alone at night…" His voice is deep and husky, it rattles in my head. His breath drifts along my shoulder blade and down my neck. I flinch and draw my bare shoulder close to my cheek. But Brax slides around me from behind and plants a fresh kiss on my neck. He closes his arms around my waist from behind. His hands cross at the front. He pulls my back against his front. But, as much as I want to stay right here, I instinctively step away and out of his grasp, looking anxiously around for witnesses.

**Brax**

"No one's around." I announce, almost irritated that she jolted away at the first chance. Disappointed. She turns to face me, and looks up at me, the lamps behind us shining in her blue eyes. "I checked already, you know." I explain. She nods slowly, assured. She thinks I don't see her check again, for her own peace of mind. But then she leans in slowly and lays her lips softly down on mine. Anticipation has me locked to the ground and I let her kiss me. It's gentle, but given enough time her warm lips sink between mine. She tastes sweet. Then, with one hand on her back, I pull her closer into me.

The kiss deepens. And as if she had forgotten what a real kiss between us is like, she gives in to it. A small moan of relief escapes her, when I wrap my bottom lip around hers, which allows my tongue to touch her bottom lip. Her hands crawl against my chest and cling to my shoulders to draw me deeper into her mouth.

I bring my hands up her arms, her skin cold to the touch. I roll the tips of my fingers up and down her arms before pulling her tightly into an embrace. She falls into the crook of my arm. I lean her to the side, taking her body weight. With the angle that has been created, I take advantage and open my mouth fully against hers. Her mouth slides open in unison and I fall deeper into it.

**Charlie**

I push him back with one firm hand. Our lips smack apart. His mouth is still open, wet. A look of surprise from my sudden retraction, on his face. I wipe my lips with the back of my hands and check the beach again.

"We cant just…" I start. He shakes his head looking into the sand, hands on hips. He looks up at me, waiting for answers? "I mean…" I swallow, still slightly breathless, my knees still weak. I can still feel the pressure in the small of my back where his hand had taken me so forcefully. I find I can't draw my eyes away from the swell of his glistening bottom lip that I so badly want back in my mouth. Even in this light, I can see his tongue quivering at the front of his mouth, eager to be back against mine. And I can't deny what I feel, not any more anyway. "Follow me."

It's as if I didn't say those words. I'm not sure he believed I said them either. He doesn't move to follow me at first. But I smile a relaxed smile, to comfort him, I lean into him. I let him take my weight against his chest. I kiss his agape mouth. "Follow me…" I repeat, sliding my fingers through his and walking away.

**Brax**

She leads me along the beach, about 100 years, towards the pier. I'll admit…I'm intrigued. But I guess I always have been when it comes to Charlie. She steals a glance back at me, and I'm not sure I've ever seen such devilish charm in her face. Her cheeks are flushed, her lips red. Just before the lamps on the pier start lighting a path over the water, she stops. She turns towards me. She slides her hands up my arms, walking into my open embrace. I resist closing my arms around her this time. She presses her body against the length of mine. With a wide teasing grin she leans around and whispers in my ear.

"You know how when we're in the bath together…" She waits.

"Yeah…" I hear myself say, completely captivated. I place my hands on her hips, suddenly at a loss for what to do - had she managed to catch me off guard again? This certainly wasn't what I was expecting when I left the restaurant.

"How you like the idea of say…" she kisses me neck. A shiver shoots down my spine. "…me naked, in the water with you."

"Yeah…" I laugh. _Pretty obvious stuff, _I think. She sinks her lips against my neck again. Another bold shiver. _Okay, obvious, but equally intense_, I think to myself.

**Charlie**

"Well, I was thinking…" And in our sheltered spot, away from the lights on the pier, and in the shadows of the wooden pillars, I begin to back into the water. He lets me walk away for a moment. But I catch his eye and raise my eyebrows signaling my intentions.

"Oh you were, were you." He smiles, reading me. And at arms length for only a moment longer, he begins to follow my guiding arms. The waves are already around our ankles. It doesn't take long before we're calf deep. They splash against our bare legs. Brax pulls me into his body. I fall easily into his embrace. "Well…" He pulls me closer against him to whisper this in my ear as he wades in around me. His hands spread on my back. My hands hold his neck. Our noses brush together.

"Well what…" I smile, and kiss his cheek, and then briefly his open mouth. When I pull back though, he has a familiar dare-devil glint in his eye, that I have become accustomed to over the months.

"I think…" but before I hear the words, or he finishes his sentence, in one quick smooth motion, he has lifted me up and slung my legs over his other arm.

"BR-ax!" I yelp. "Brax…put me down!" I laugh, but he splashes further into the water.

When it's thigh deep, despite my wriggling and with great ease, he drops my legs and swings me round his waist. His hands support my bum. I pull the hair out of my face and it skims down my back. Without any words needed, I shake my head, smile at his irresistible cheeky grin and lean in for a kiss.

**Brax**

For the spontaneity, she reciprocates with a mouth-watering kiss. Her lips suck at mine over and over, at such a pace that I can't keep up with them. So I let her gouge on me. I widen my jaw against hers. Our open mouths match each other, and our tongues push through and meet, crashing together at once. I reach up with my hand and hold the back of her neck, hold her mouth closer to mine, and twist my head to crawl deeper into her mouth. I groan. I can't help myself.

I wade deeper, desperate to be under the cover of water with her. But she doesn't seem to care who might see for a moment, and tears at my shirt. She balances around my waist and at the same time pulls open a row of buttons. She tugs one side over my shoulder, exposing my skin. She kisses it frantically. Her cold hands reach inside my shirt and spread across my waistline. Her hands are colder than the water that slips over my hips. I walk deeper. The water covers her thighs, and I feel her legs tighten around me in response. I feel her tongue still against mine and her breath catch in her lungs as the cold water spreads between her legs. With one hand, I pull her bottom against my hardening cock. I smile, and roll my tongue round her wet mouth. I suck at her lips, one at a time, moving between the top and the bottom. Our lips part slightly, and I watch her as I press the tip of my tongue against hers, trying as if I am trying to probe her into action. But she watches me back.

**Charlie **

The water is freezing. I hold myself against Brax, his body so big compared to me. I literally hang off him. His eyes watch me as we play with our kiss. Between the silence, all I can hear is the click of our tongues as they meet in the open space between our mouths. The smack of our lips echo as they break apart. Our mouths are given a moment to widen before the next kiss. He openly sticks out his wet tongue and slides it into my mouth. It's reaching for my tongue. He's warm and wet and I close my lips around him, sucking him in before giving into the satisfaction of what he wanted, and touching my tongue fully against his.

Before I realise it, the water is up to my chest. Brax, still steady against the swell of each wave, with one hand, pries my top away from my skin. He slides his warm fingers around my bare breast and pinches with soft turns, my hard nipple. I squeeze my legs around him and feel his hard length press against my opening. He moves over, and repeats the action with my other nipple. And already the tension, the build up, the passion is too much to bear…

**Brax**

It's like everything I had been anticipating all afternoon, the long wait, had suddenly exploded. She reciprocates. Her hands dive for the buttons on my shorts. She tears them open and I feel the pressure subside slightly as I am released from the tight trousers. She draws my solid cock from my boxers, enveloping me just like water. I suck her bottom lip harder, bowing my head, when she squeezes with her fist. The first touch so rigid and meaningful that it caught me by surprise. She rolls her hand up and down my length, using the finger tips from her other to trace circles on my tip. I stifle another groan with a wave.

With abrupt urgency, I pull open her shorts roughly and push a hand between her legs. I feel her relax her legs for me with anticipation. I push my hand down the front of her panties, briefly graze her clit, but push two fingers roughly inside her. Instinctively, she rises up, as if trying to escape. I pull out briefly before pushing inside again, deeper this time. A squeak of agony, ecstasy escapes her quivering lips. I move to suck them harder.

**Charlie **

His fingers are freezing inside me. I try and hold myself down on them, but his wriggling hand jolts inside of me, back and forth and I can't. His thumb begins to brush my clit. The immediate intensity is almost too much to bear. I kiss him back, furiously, trying to take my mind off the rush of excitement and enjoy his touch. I frown with frustration. Already I can feel the burn grow in my body. I massage him more ferociously, and feel him harden, expand in my hand. I push his shorts down further with my legs, exposing him fully. I pull him into the palm of my hand and contract my fist.

He draws his fingers momentarily from me. With his help, I slide one leg out of my shorts and panties. He finds his way and plants his fingers directly back inside me, filling more of me, pressing harder, sinking higher in me. I am aware of him watching as I stiffen with pleasure. Then he starts to rub my clit again, the hard nub tight between my body and his thumb. I push down against his hand now, urging him on. Somehow we've drifted. Brax turns me and presses me up against the hard wooden pillar of the pier. The cold wood covers my back and gives him all the control he wants…

**Brax**

The pulse of her hand is getting stronger, more insistent. I'm getting more impatient and desperate to be inside her. I press her hard up against the wood, opening her legs wide under the water that swarms around us. I adjust her body by pulling her hips away from the pillar and towards me. I settle my hands against the roundness of her hips and bottom and hold her steady. I lean my tip against her warm opening, letting it drift there for a brief moment. Our eyes meet. I follow the heat and thrust up inside her. At the same time I pull her hard down on me. I thud inside her and with nothing but instinct, I retract and thrust again, landing again with a thump.

She tightens her legs around my waist and I ooze deeper. I lean my head for relief against her shoulder. I push her tiny figure up against the wood, flattening her against it again. I use my body to pin her, my hands to hold her down tight over me. I move in her again, rocking my hips around in a circular motion. She moans with this and I feel myself harden at the sound. The cold water in contrast to the heat of being inside her makes my heart pound faster in my chest. I reach round behind her to gain stability by pushing my hand against the wooden pillar. I cling to the wood and thrust again. Her back hammers unexpectedly against the hard pillar. But I move so deep because of this that I can't help but drive my body into hers like this again…

**Charlie**

His cock beats inside me. He's so hard and it's in such contrast to the soft water that it feels like a whole new sexual experience. I finger his hair line. I kiss his damp shoulder blade, wiping my mouth across it. He continues to move back and forth within me. I cling to his body, but really there's nothing I can do but succumb to his every move. I hold myself down over him, I don't want to feel that empty feeling when he's not swimming inside me. Each time he drives into my body, he slides deeper. Each thrust though is harder, and the wood scrapes my back, his large cock forces my opening to expand. I can feel every burn the friction is creating on my skin. But it adds to the mounting pressure of pleasure.

He begins to pump harder against me. He groans with every thrust. The water laps around us rhythmically. He moves between my legs and finds my clit. He pounds it with his fingers. I begin to twitch from under him. I roll my head back against the wood as he slides to the left and wriggles between the folds in my skin to find the one place that makes my insides twist with pleasure.

I arch my back, his fingers being exposed to more of this sensitive area. He knows me. His thrusts get harder, more vicious with every tremor I allow to escape. His thumb taps more strongly. I fight the urge to tighten my grip around him, and instead loosen my legs, widening them. Brax falls even closer to me, and thunders inside me.

**Brax**

That final moment, when I slip deeper, and feel her contract powerfully, her body bearing down around me, I loose myself. I drive forward once more and explode deep inside her. I fall completely still, buried deep in her, as I feel and let my cock burst entirely, continuously. I push myself up on my feet, holding myself so profoundly inside her. Except for my fingers, which I use to squeeze and rub her clit, up and down, double the pace. My fingers fit neatly against her skin, this place so delicate to the touch that it has her reeling. Her body tightens instantly with this change. But I continue. And then she gasps. I feel her opening contract around the base of my cock, before it spreads throughout. I ride out her orgasm with her, rocking inside her, emptying myself still internally lost.

She twitches around me, her head buried in my shoulder. She lays kisses into my collarbone, the first sign of emotion or anything other than pure lust for a good few minutes. I register the waves for the first time. I relax and roll with them, letting them push me up against her. I turn to her, open my mouth and close my lips over hers, drawing them away very slowly. Then I open my mouth again, and kiss her over and over.

**Charlie **

He slides away from me, and I see him adjust the waistband of his shorts under the water. He helps me to lift my leg back in mine. I straighten my top, which had skewed amidst the passion. He holds my arm, holding me above the waves as I look down into the water to do the button on my shorts. Still, no words have been spoken. And then out of nowhere, an unexpected rush of a rogue wave rolls in behind us. As it turns on itself, it crashes into Brax's back. I don't have time to look away, and the spray hits me face on, cold and rough. Its force has lifted Brax momentarily off his feet. He's carried into my body. Our arms and legs tangle as we try to regain our balance against each other. Like a pro and so used to being in the water, Brax has steadied himself and wraps his arms around me, picking me up. When I regain composure, I pull my arms up and wrap them around his shoulders and let him walk me up the beach until we're only waist deep.

"So there's also no point pretending I don't like taking baths or going swimming with you either…" Brax says, finally breaking our silence. He puts me down on my feet. I bounce with the wave for a minute. I turn to the beach and then back to him, my hands still square on his bare shoulders.

"I guess not…" I say quietly. I pull my hands down his chest and let them hang on the waist band of his pants.

"Yeah - I guess not." He repeats, smiling widely.

**Brax**

It all happened so fast, the last few minutes, that it was more like one of our ten-minute rendezvous - typically mad passionate sex; frenzy and fury driving us on. And that just wasn't how today had been, earlier on I mean, in her house. Earlier had been a connection. It all felt slower, more meaningful, more…romantic I guess. Even more strange, was how I sort of missed that now. The last few minutes had certainly been sexy and impassioned, but that being over within minutes, the loneliness, a longing, for her, for Charlie takes over again.

Shaking my head with despair at myself, I pull Charlie in close with one arm, and she settles her head against my chest. I hold her there and breathe in the wet damp smell of our bodies.

"Brax…" she says, turning her lips and kissing between the layers of my wet clinging shirt.

"Yeah…" I say, twisting a circle into the small of her back, clutching her wet writhing body to me.

"Come home with me tonight."

**Charlie**

I'm scared to hear his response. I regret saying the words instantly. I close my eyes in agony, the wait unbearable. And in an off-hand, uncommitted and almost uncertain manner…

"Sure…yep." He answers.


	4. Chapter 4

Hello lovely readers. Massive apologies for the huge lapse in chapter updates. Every day I want to write more and publish more, but time continues to be my enemy. Thank you so much for all your fab comments and for wanting to keep updated to this story – it means a huge amount! Please keep reading … please keep reviewing … and please keep demanding more! It makes me want to write so much more when you do!

Setting: after the "Great Storm", the day of Tegan's death. I'm convinced there was a massive Chax event that didn't happen at the end of that episode! (As I say, I didn't have chance to finish it properly before now, hence why it's so late in comparison to when the episode was aired) But plenty more Chax on the way

NC-17 – Reader beware!

_**Ch.4 - Then don't trust them **_

_**Charlie**_

I can't sleep. Not after today. In fact, I was contemplating getting up when I am startled by something outside. I look towards the window, expectantly, and wait. Nothing. I turn over, with a sigh and plant my head deep into my pillow. I open my eyes again, frustrated. I can still hear her voice. See her face. How many times have I been in that situation, and never thought twice about it later that day. I'm rarely awake like this. And yet, I know exactly why I am tonight.

My phone vibrates. Glad of the distraction, I reach over and squint, my eyes adjusting to the light. Brax. _Are you awake? _I hit reply. But in my hand, it starts to vibrate again, this time his name springs up on the screen.

"Brax." I answer, leaning up on one arm. He doesn't say anything, but I know he can hear me. I can hear him, I know he's there. "Are you okay?" I know he's not. I knew he wasn't 'okay' in the hospital earlier. It was the first time I had ever seen him so distraught, and yet clinging to every shred of strength he had left.

"Nah. Nah, I'm not." I search for words.

"Where are you..?"

"Erm, out. Just…out, the beach."

_**Brax**_

I turn back down the road, walking away again. I grit my teeth. Crane my neck up at the star-less sky. I hold the phone away from my mouth and let out a groan of frustration. I twist on the spot. I wipe my hand across my burning eyes.

"...aren't you at home?" I catch, as I put the phone against my ear. Composed again.

"I dunno. I just…I can't be there." I say.

"Brax…" I hear her sigh, she hears my pain. Somewhere inside me, that annoys and pleases me all at once. More confusion. "You need to get some rest." She tells me. "Give yourself some time."

"Yeah…yeah you're right." There's a long pause. She doesn't speak. I can't speak. I stand still in the middle of the road, letting the dark, the quiet, the pain engulf me.

"Brax, I am really sorry." She whispers. I swallow.

"Charlie…Charlie, I'm outside…"

_**Charlie**_

"What are you doing here?" I whisper, opening the door a little wider. He smirks. Shakes his head and looks at the ground. I think he might walk away at that.

"She's dead." He says. Pure honestly laid out in front of us – for a change. When he looks up, I can see his eyes glistening. He looks away, having been caught out. He sniffs. "She's dead." He smirks again. "And all I can _think _about,"

"Brax…" I sigh, seeing his pain for real now.

"All I can think about, is what I did."

"Brax." I say again, pleading that he doesn't go on.

"To you, Charlie."

"Don't beat yourself up. Not over this." His eyes stare at me, grind holes in my heart. "Brax, you said it yourself it was an accident today, and before…" the words get choked in my throat, seeing him like this. So vulnerable. So lost. So needing something. Forgiveness?

"I don't want you to-to just excuse it." He says, spitting the words out. I stare back at him, his sudden aggression surprising me.

"Then why are you here?" I ask, without thinking.

_**Brax**_

I can't answer her. I can't think straight. All I can think about, is her though.

"Yeah listen." I manage, having recomposed myself. I tap the doorway and turn away, ready to leave.

"Brax." She reaches out. "Brax, don't go." I turn back to her. And for the first time since I stormed her night, I notice the bright blue of her silk nightgown. It's not tied closed, but instead wavers in the breeze. I look up at her face, her soft eyes, her skin bare from make up. I swallow. "Not…not like this. Not, tonight." She whispers.

She holds out her hand. I stare at it for a moment, lost between leaving and staying. Isn't this why I came here? Reluctantly, I let her slide her fingers between mine. Her touch is more gentle than I can remember right now. In the silence, her hand draws me closer, in through the open door, one centimeter at a time.

_**Charlie**_

Our eyes are locked in a trance. I slide my hand up his bare hot arm, and hold his elbow. It's like I'm remembering. His hand pulls my waist to him in a circular motion, his fingers squeezing my hip bone, holding me tight in one grasp. He leans in through the doorway. I push the door closed silently behind him and slowly look up. The tips of our noses brush together, we're that close. It would take only one of us to move the slightest bit closer, but for a moment longer, we both hold back; anxious, like neither of us remember what that world is like anymore.

In the pitch dark, his lips begin to click open a little wider, nervously. His nose nuzzles upwards to draw mine open too. I open my mouth wide against the air between us. His bottom lip is far back in my mouth before our lips begin close around each other silently. I hear him breath out and swallow deeply as I close my mouth around his large lip. I groan silently. I can feel his tongue warm against the roof of my mouth. He pushes it forward and slides it down the length of my tongue steadily.

_**Brax**_

I'm at home. Completely at peace. Right here. I lift my hand to the side of her face. I stroke my fingers down her cheek, so close to where our mouths touch that I can feel the heat and the movement of our tongues beneath the skin.

But I stop. I still my lips and my tongue. Slowly, I draw back. With my mouth still open, I move it, wet and warm, from side to side over hers, rubbing our agape lips over one another. They slide easily across hers. Her lips continue kissing my open mouth for a second longer. And then she lets me just graze our mouths together, and lets me watch her face as I do. I sigh. Overcome with something that I just cannot control, I move my mouth across her cheek, kiss it and then sink into the warm sweet curve of her neck. I press my lips there first and then tilt my head and rest my forehead against her neck, burying it deep.

_**Charlie**_

I am frozen to the spot, totally in shock as he stills, hiding in my neck. Sensing no breakdown and yet also no re-composure, I lift my hand up and place it on his neck. I hold him there. I swallow down the agony of seeing him like this. I open and close my fingers against the back of his head. Comfort? It must be. And yet, I continue to hold back any possible sign of what witnessing his emotional collapse is doing to me. I swallow down the quiver in my voice, the tremble in my heart, and I hold him.

He's arched into me. Slowly he crawls deeper somehow, and wraps me into a tight embrace. He's so strong that his tight arms lift me off the ground slightly. I let him. I close my arms around his back, stroke his broad shoulders and, wait to see if he does what I so want him to next.

_**Brax**_

As realization of where I am, what I've just let myself do, sweeps over me, I recover myself. I didn't come here for this. Then again, not being with her is also tearing me apart. We break apart, awkwardly and almost as quickly as I found myself against her. Her arms gently break away from around me, I lean back slightly. But as soon as we do, her hand finds the side of my face, and traces a path under my eye. Her palm slides against my neck, and she pulls me in again for another kiss. As we break away after every single kiss, she studies my face and sees right down inside me today. Like no barrier that's usually there, is left.

And as if she can read that I wont make the first move, that I can't, she takes my hand in hers and draws it close to her chest. She places it between her breasts, slightly higher than the rim of her nightdress, so it covers her bare skin. She presses her hand down on the back of mine and then leaves it there.

_**Charlie**_

It was all it took. I'm not going to kid myself into believing that I didn't know that his hand would eagerly slip down under the front of my nightdress and round my breast in a matter of seconds. That his cold fingers would pinch at my nipple for only a teasing second before he whipped his hand out my top to fling his one arm around me. That in one moment, he would have me hinged in his bent arm, feet off the floor, his face completely buried against my neck, carrying me back towards my room.

Back in my room, we're breathless with eagerness. I fight his grasp to be released, and pull my nightdress over my head. He tears his shirt over his head, his hair ruffled when he reappears. He plants his hand awkwardly on my neck, and then runs his fingers down quickly over my breast, and then across my chest to the other side. It's rough and uncomfortable between us, which is strange and unexpected. Usually it just flows. Tonight, it's different.

_**Brax**_

I unbuckle my jeans. She reaches out and holds the backs of my hands as I undo them. I can feel myself getting uncomfortably tight already. I leave them open for her, my attention caught by her tiny waist, by the thin line of her panties against her dark tanned skin. I let the tip of my finger slip beneath the waistband and run my hand all the way around. I watch as she leans up on her tiptoes, intrigued. But I pull my hand back and instead push my trousers down over my hips. They drop to the floor between us.

She smooth's her hands up and over my chest, her fingers catch my nipples, and pause on my pecks. I push down my boxers, and stand up again. And then we're right back there; in a place where it all feels completely new again.

_**Charlie **_

Maybe it's me. Maybe it's just how I am feeling today. But even so, I feel nervous because of it. Like I don't know what to do next. Like I can't remember how we work. How our bodies are usually in unison, like clockwork at this point. He places one random hand on my upper arm, and pulls me in to kiss me again. We both tilt our heads, and our lips sink softly together in the middle. I feel his tongue jut out against my top lip. He tastes raw and sharp. And yet still so familiar to me.

I swallow against his lips, and walk closer, into his naked body. I can feel him hard against my skin. The only thing between us, is the barrier of my panties. But as our kiss deepens, and his hand squeezes my bum tightly, his other tears down the material over my backside, and down my legs, as he lifts me with one firm hand.

_**Brax**_

I'm shaking, and I don't want to know why. The tighter I grip her, the more my insides tremble. Every time I feel her tongue slide against my lips though, I feel myself grow harder, I get hotter. They're reverse roles, fighting against one another. I can't do anything, but roll her back onto her bed, and climb over her. She looks expectantly up at me, as if she's waiting for me to reassure her, to tell her everything she wants to hear. But I've never been that guy. I'm not him. Is that why all this is so hard? I close the gap between us, physically forcing the questions away, closing the thoughts that continue to flood my mind as she blinks up at me, by kissing her roughly. I plant my lips down on hers over and over, twisting above her. Her hand reaches round and holds my back, strokes it gently. It's too soft. I reach back, grabbing her wrist. I lift it above her head, and place the other one to meet it. I clasp both wrists tightly in my fingers, pinching.

Her eyes don't leave mine. I stare down at her for a long moment, our eyes flicking from one to the other. Then I kiss her passionately again. I don't want any moment to linger. I don't trust it right now.

_**Charlie **_

My heart pounds with his every move. He's unnerving me. It's a whole new vulnerability to him that I didn't know existed. It's so raw. He's clutching at the remains of control. But more than ever, I can see through his strength and power today, as it slowly fizzles away. I see past the bold bravado and the impulsiveness. I can see the need and the desperation for this, us, right here, today. And so, I give in.

I open my legs and he slips between them. As if it was all the encouragement he needed, he slides two fingers quickly inside me. He pushes back and forth inside me stiffly. But even the force and the motion of him inside me - the every thought that it was him, his fingers, his warmth - makes me close my eyes, bite down on my lip and arch my back. A twist of ecstasy escapes me, and I shudder. He draws his fingers back absently at this, and trembling as he lifts himself over me, finds his way between my legs. He looks down between our bodies, but grips my hands tighter above my head as he moves carefully between me, and finally pushes up inside me. At that moment, when I am jolted, and thinking about his weight above me, his size inside me, I shudder and tighten around him uncontrollably for a second. But I also notice that his eyes close sharply. His head bows down against my chest, and his fingers fall loose from around mine. I fling my arms around his back and hold him tight.

_**Brax**_

For a long time I'm so lost, and locked so tightly inside her, that I just cant move. For a long time I can't bring myself to even lift my head. But gradually, as I sink deeper inside her, and begin to notice the gentle circular motion of her hips beginning beneath me, I swallow down all the emotion that has burst to the forefront and allow myself to lean in and nuzzle her soft neck. I kiss her, I can taste her on my lips, which is more comfort than I could ask for today.

I move down to kiss her bare chest. I kiss the smooth rise of the inside of her breast that bulges under my tongue. I lick her skin with the thick of my tongue, tasting her, before moving over to cover her rose coloured nipple with my whole mouth. I suck her deep, my lips wet and warm. She moans lightly. I begin to push my tongue back and forth over her nipple. She arches her back again, with another moan. Her fingers slide into my hair, and so, taking the hint, I kiss a neat path up her neck and swallow her mouth.

_**Charlie **_

I can't help but suck his tongue passionately and deeply into my mouth. I eagerly kiss him desperate to feel him to move inside me again. I urge him on, and he responds. He pushes his arms down by our side and supports his own weigh as he arches above and away from me. The shift is sudden and I am reminded of his size between my legs. I gasp. Instinctively, I pull up me knees, and he shifts again. This time, his eyes bang closed, control slipping away again.

I reach round and taking advantage, pull him from the buttocks deeper inside me. One of his arms buckles. In response, he thrusts up inside me automatically, and then repeats this action with intent.

_**Brax**_

I draw her legs around me, sliding my hands up her tense thighs. She clasps her ankles behind my back. I pull myself deeper inside her, before reaching round and grasping her petite bum in my hands. I slide one hand a little higher, and still inside her, lift her slowly off the bed.

"Brax…" she manages to gasp. I lean up on my knees and slide her down over my length again. Carefully, I push one leg back and stand up tall. As I do, her legs tighten instinctively around me. She clings to me for support. I hold her back, my hands splayed across it. I turn and find the wall closest, and walk into it, pressing her back flat against it.

Now positioned, I pull my chest from hers, watching and guiding her as I let her slip lower down over me. At the same time, I push her up against her. With nowhere to avoid me, she has no control and slips further down around me. I hear her breath catch in her throat. With my hands, I position her body towards mine, a better angle, and directing myself towards the wall, I push far inside her again.

_**Charlie**_

There's something more erotic about him having me like this. A thought that makes me even more weak. I clutch at his back, physically trapped. But at the same time, I pull him deeper inside me with my feet.

I can feel his whole body clenching every time he drives into me. Every muscle in a tight knot as he supports me. He rides into me again. The friction as he pries me open, is so intense. But it has blended into an unknown passion. As he grinds his body further into me, pushing the air from my lungs, he begins to groan, grunt, with every beat, every pulse. It's so hot. And it's so raw. It's so right.

**Brax**

I steal a brief moment, and massage her small breast in my hand. I rotate my hips in a similar fashion. As I support her weight, and ride against her, I can feel my knees trembling with the strain. Unable to get exactly where I want to go, I close my arms around her tiny back and lean away from the wall. I swing us round to the bed and with little thought, throw us down into the duvet. But Charlie springs back from up from the mattress, and spins me over. With little effort plants herself down over me. Not realizing how much I was missing out on, I glide much deeper inside her warm opening and jerk uncontrollably up inside her as I do. She holds herself down purposely over me, as I writhe beneath her. I catch her smile as I do.

Taking her hips in my hands I hold her down as I try to thrust up inside her again. But instead, she has absolute control and at an aggravating pace, slowly draws a huge circle over me with her hips. The pressure she uses to lean down on me, the wriggle of her hips, the twinge of her thigh muscles – and I am gasping and groaning for air.

**Charlie**

I knew I had him at my mercy from the second I felt him slip deeper inside me, widen me further. The ecstasy of having him this far inside me, but feel this comfortable at the same time was clearly driving him mad, and has me driving on for more.

His eyes are closed, but I know his senses are going wild with fury. I tense my thighs rhythmically, knowing that this changes things, knowing that this adds another level of pressure for him. I see the lines in his face tense. His lips quiver. His tongue darts out to wet his lips. I hold back the urge to lean down and slip mine in his mouth. I run my tongue over my dry lips. I tense my legs over and over again, begin to roll my hips anti-clockwise, and then start round again. He holds me tighter with his hands, digging with his fingers. He adjusts his leg to stop it trembling, but I just press down harder, and he has no control again.

**Brax**

I reach round with my hand, and press my fingers into the small of her back, trying to urge her down over me. She resists. With all my strength, I lift my knees and Charlie slips forward on me slightly. I take the opportunity and knock her to the side. Before she, or I, can think, I can plough into her from above again. I pull up her knees up. For a moment I slip my arm under her knee and hold it there beside us as I ride up inside her and press down repetitively, urging her on. When I let her free, I slide down and she sighs as I kiss her mouth. Her arms hold my neck, my face and then slide up and she lies them above her head, crossed at the wrist.

I smile. She smiles. And for the first time, there is a moment. I reach up and in my hands take her wrists in mine and, still grinning at each other, hold her arms above her head.

_**Charlie**_

He thrusts into me wildly, even he has no control over his movements now. I writhe beneath him, trapped in one position, my arms held tightly above me head in his gasp, my legs plastered outwards, with his heavy warm weight between them. I close my eyes, and bury my face against his soft shoulder as he slides closer down over me. His movements are faster, stronger, but his body is heavier; spent. I nuzzle his warm skin, let my wet lips taste his familiar body. I hold my mouth open, my breath tight in my throat, as he plunges inside me once, twice more before he slows.

His body stills. I still beneath him. For a moment, he is quiet and then with a roll of his hips he exhales with a winding groan. His whole body clenches above me, around me, as he spills deep inside me. He pushes lightly into me, but this urges him on and he stills again, emptying himself further. Warmth spreads between us, I close me legs around him and pull him gently deeper, prolonging his enjoyment. His fingers, once again, fall limps around mine. I stoke them gently above our heads, as he gradually relaxes and his head falls to my shoulder.

_**Brax**_

I can't speak. So I slide off her very slightly, to relieve her of my weight. Her legs hold me on her though. I look up at her face from her shoulder, my mind hazy, my eyes foggy, my body so heavy. I place my hand from above our heads on her cheek, and turn her head towards mine. Saying nothing, giving nothing away, I lean up and open my mouth fully around hers. I find her tongue and slide mine against it. She doesn't retaliate, but she doesn't pull away. I twist my mouth over hers the other way. I take a breath, and plunge my tongue into the dark hole of her mouth again. I break away, but only to kiss her chin, then the dark space underneath her chin, the point of her collar bone and the crook of her neck. I kiss the dip in her shoulder and the freckle on her arm. I kiss the join of her arm, nipping my tongue over the rippled skin.

My breathing slowing now, my breath back, my eyes are so heavy. I close them even before I lie my head on her shoulder and chest again.

_**Charlie**_

Before long, his body is so heavy and his breathing so slow, that I know he is asleep. My fingers that automatically found their way to his broad shoulder, and lightly stroked out lines back and forth, stills. I look down at him sleeping. So quiet, so calm. He's lying half over me still, almost in exactly the same position he was in when he was inside me. I revel in that thought for a moment - of what I'd just done, what I'd let him do, what we'd just done. Together. The longing, the excruciating waiting and questioning whether it _should _ever happen again is over…again.

For now though, I'm not going to question it. Not going to analyse whether I can actually take the waiting again. For now, I'm just going to watch him so like this. So relaxed. So comfortable. And let myself believe for a second, let myself remember, that this is what he needed today, what he wanted. What he came looking for. What I hope, he can and will keep looking for.


	5. Chapter 5

Hi you lovely readers

First – thanks for all your amazing comments/story-favourite-ing activities. I'm glad it's keeping you all interested – I'm thoroughly enjoying writing it! For those of you up-to-date with Australian episodes, there is (obviously and certainly) PLENTY more I want to write about given the latest episodes! I can barely write quick enough…! I'm undecided whether car scene is important enough or skip straight to the latest beach scenes?

Please please keep commenting – I love to hear everything, including advice. In response, I have made this chapter longer than the previous ones (hopefully not too long!)

Setting for this chapter – following her near death experience and a lack of faith when it comes to her relationship with Brax, Charlie escapes town, leaving Brax behind. On her return though, Brax's drunken antics to deal with his raw emotions are perhaps too much for Charlie to ignore.

**Chapter 5 – Then don't trust them.**

_**Brax **_

All in a days work - that's what I used to think. Not anymore.

I pause after I finish my last sentence.

"I just want to see you…" I add, trailing off. Sighing, I end the message, switching off the call. It wasn't going to happen. I drove her away. I'm the last person she wants to see right now. _Have I really changed so much that I now leave messages like this?_ For a moment, I regret ever dialing her number. But then the fact that I haven't seen her, even 'around' lately, just makes me want to dial her number again to hear her voice, hope that she'll pick up. I regret the way I let her leave…and I don't have regrets.

_**Charlie**_

He makes my skin crawl. He makes everything that I see so clearly, completely uncertain. He makes anger rise in me so easily. And it's all so uncontrollable with him. It's all totally unsure. It's a gamble. And why I've let myself gamble this much so far, I just don't understand. It's not me. It's not who I am. As I sit alone and let my mind roll back and forth over these same thoughts, I'm just getting more frustrated with myself, for ever letting myself consider that I should let him in. His vulnerabilities, his passion, his strength for those around him, have all conned me. I'm to blame for what's happened. And it was always going to happen. What's worse? I knew it all along.

From the couch in my hotel room, curled up, I cancel his call and wait for the fourth voicemail to flicker onto my screen. I brush away my tears. I press the red cancel button again. I just can't hear his voice anymore.

_**Brax**_

When I see her again, it's from across the car park, as she arrives for work. It's a strange kind of relief to see her. She's so smart in her uniform - pressed, firm, in control. _She's back_. My mind wanders back to when I saw her last and before I can stop myself I ask once again whether_ her emotional state of mind really my fault? _Well maybe that's why it's so good to see her _right_ again now - why I have been so desperate to see her as 'Charlie' again, the woman I know her to be. Just to check she's still okay. The woman I need her to be. Seeing her, perhaps that's all I have been waiting for.

She doesn't see me. And it's only then, when I turn the key in the ignition and pull out into the road to drive off, that I am reminded of how ridiculously hooked I am. Third day in a row that I have waited to see if she turns up for work, and she finally reappears, as if she never left, as if she never disappeared. I ignore how desperate I am for her and slip away unnoticed accelerating away quickly, as if the quicker I leave will change the fact that I was ever here, waiting for her. I ignore the burning thought at the forefront of my mind that questions whether _she has missed seeing me? _Instead I just let myself think; _she's back_.

_**Charlie**_

I stay in for lunch. He hasn't rang me for two days. _What does that mean? And why does that question driving me insane? _It's like an inch in the back of my mind. I haven't seen him since I've been back. And that is killing me. I swear though - it's only because I'm getting so sick of becoming more nervous to look up every time I step outside. I have scurried to work, and not left the house otherwise, since I have been back at home. To anyone that looks at me with concerned eyes, I've fooled them so far with a confidence that I'm sure they'll buy with no hesitation. That's who I am. _I'm fine…_for now, now that I don't have to see him. Now that I can manage to get away with steering myself clear of any potential run-ins. _Is this my idea of 'cured' of him? _

"Charlie," I look up from the file I'm staring into "…arrest warrant for Casey Braxton." I look back at my colleague. My confidence immediately fades.

"Right…"

_**Brax**_

What was I thinking? Did I actually say those words; _I miss you Charlie?_ What _was_ I thinking?How have I managed to get myself into _such _a state? Over this; absolutely nothing. Nothing at all.

She actually flinched when I touched her face. _What was that? Why does that make me so angry?_ When I touch her skin, my hand burns for minutes afterwards. And yet she just moved away from that. _And_ _did I see less desperation to walk back into it as well? _I told her that I miss her. It's not a lie, I do. I did miss her, I do miss her. Every day. But after I admitted those words - that I am convinced of - she turned and walked right out the door. I mean, I know she said the words back, but they were just words. There was no conviction, no thought to them. You know, I can't remember what it feels like to _know _that she is as messed up as I am. Not so long ago, we were friends that couldn't be friends because we wanted more. _What does that make us now? _So far beyond what we're ever going to be capable of getting back.

_**Charlie**_

Before I even got out the car, I knew how it was going to pan out. I've been handling drunk gangs for years. What's more, I've been handling drunk river-boys for what feels like years. It wasn't that that was the problem though. As ever, Brax was. My biggest problem. I can already see him; totally intoxicated. And I cant help but hear that familiar voice in my head that points the finger at me for leading him to this, by being totally false about everything I'm feeling for him.

With every movement he stumbles a little bit further than he intends to. Even with my hand holding him, I can barely guide him through open spaces. I'm doing my best to ignore the fact that I know _why_ he is so drunk. The few moments that we have had together since I've been back makes _why _I'm taking him home in this state, more than clear. I walk with him through his front porch, aware of how dangerous this is even though he is the ridiculously vulnerable one right now. I watch him slump onto the couch.

When he grabs my hand and pulls me back I know I should look away; I know what his eyes do to me. But his tired blinks and heavy lids straining only makes me want to slide down beside him and tell him everything _can_ be okay, that it will be eventually. That I'm tired too. From here, I can see all his pain, every one of his many troubles. Every word makes me more certain that somehow I'm to blame for this. His fingers are so soft against mine, they stroke mine as he talks, so gentle, so sensual. So normal. Something inside me tells me not to let go. He's so drunk. He won't possibly remember if I let myself hold his hand for a moment longer…

_**Brax**_

When she sits down beside me on the couch, I put my arm down along the back of the couch - innocently of course. But she sits up, away from me. She throws me a warning look. I hold up my hands in defence, with honesty.

"Too complicated." She says looking at me warily. I breathe deeply and say nothing. I can feel the alcohol swarming around in my head. I take a long deep pause and then look up at her with all the honesty I can fathom.

"You know I'm in love with you right?" I ask it like a question. Matter of fact. Brutal. I want to check that she does know, I think. She glares back at me, as if I had just scalded her. Or is that her _you're so stupid _look?

"Brax." She hasn't blinked yet. "You're drunk." Clearly the_ you're stupid _look_._ She moves to stand up, pushing away from the couch. But before she can get away, I grab her tiny wrist in my fist again, hold it tight.

"I know." I admit smiling. "But I do, I still love you."

"Stoppit Brax." She hisses. She doesn't get up though. But then again she doesn't turn back. She just sits there, on the couch, paused in a position of easy-get-away.

_**Charlie**_

There's that moment, where you can do two things. Both drastically opposite from the other. There's no real reason why you should do one or the other. But there's no real reason why you shouldn't either. I bite my lip, and hear myself question what he must be thinking right now. I want to turn back and see the wait in his face, _is he waiting to hear me say the same back. _Because I don't think I can.

The silence is dragging, I start to search for what to say. He's drunk, I remind myself.

"I'm not that drunk." He whispers, as if he heard the questions in my head. Slowly he pushes his back away from the couch. His thumb traces the beating veins on the inside of my wrist. Up and down. He's got me already. He leans up closer. I can't move from the spot.

"Re-eally" I manage awkwardly, beginning to smile but all the time, aware of him growing nearer to me. "Because you seem quite…" He leans into me, his chest pressing up against my bare arm, his face closing in on the gap between my shoulder and cheek. I stumble for words because of it all.

"Do i?" The smell of alcohol is like a wave of air. I ignore it. I swallow hard as I hear his heavy breathing and the trickle of air down the collar of my shirt. Shivers dart down my spine. I don't move as he edges closed, bringing his head in to my cheek. And then, just before he can touch me, sense strikes, and I flinch away into the empty space.

_**Brax**_

"I can't." I hear her say, her voice quivering. She moved away so fast I barely have chance to realise she's getting away. She can't even bring herself to look at me after that. I hold up my hands again, still innocent.

"Fine." I answer. "Fine." I whisper again. I sigh and slump back into the sofa sliding my hands around my head. I let my eyes close run my tongue over my dry lips. Defeated.

"So…" I hear her say. I let my hands drop to the sofa beside me and laugh. Really laugh.

"You know what Charlie…" I snap back, "you can just leave." I strike the couch with my fist. She looks shocked but she can tell I meant it. _I do mean it. I'm not sitting here playing back and forths for it to come to more in-decisiveness. _"You know what" I start again, "– I know how I feel." I argue, "I know what I want. It's you." I point, sitting forward, "you're the one who wants to mess things up for us. For what we _could _be."

"Brax…" she manages, still reeling from my sudden aggression.

"I don't want to play this game anymore. This _is not_ who I am Charlie."

_**Charlie**_

As a cop I'd have walked out by now. No, I'd have arrested him. Drunk. Disorderly. But totally emotional. And completely honest. I swallow down the urge to argue back. It wasn't the lines in his face, or the utter desperation in his hazy eyes. It was his words, his honesty that has me glued and silenced. It's rare, on both our parts. I open my mouth to speak again but close it when he turns away, uninterested in anything I might have to say. I haven't said want he wants me to say once tonight, what more is there left to say?

We sit in silence, next to each other and yet a million miles apart…a massive brick wall between us – _nothing new then. _I could just leave. I flick my head towards him, and then reach over and take his hand in mine. I thought for a moment he was going to whip it away, I think he nearly did, but then he looks at it, considers it. My fingers around his fist. I turn his palm over and press mine into it. They're both hot, and slide against each other. I hold us together tightly.

"I want to be with you Brax."

_**Brax**_

"Yeah – well you don't show it."

"I c-an't show it." She answers back. I smirk. _Poor excuse. Old excuse, _I think. Out of the corner of my eye, I see her turn towards me. She waits for me to respond, but she'll be waiting a long time. But then I see her lift my hand in hers. She brings it up to her lips and plants her mouth on my knuckle. Her lips linger. Then she wipes them softly all the way across the line of knuckles, and back again. Her mouth clicks apart from my hand. Cold air rushes over where her mouth had been moments ago. I see her tilt her head to the side, expectantly trying to catch my attention. I turn towards the window, unamused. I cant see her at all now.

This time, from the faint tickle and warmth that spreads between my fingers, I feel her draw her tongue along every crease where my finger meets the next. Then she moves to the next, and the next. Her mouth rides up, over the ridges of my knuckles again before she kisses the back of my hand firmly. I turn back towards her. She's crept up further onto the couch whilst I turned away. I watch her take an intake of breath and then swallow her nerves. I turn my torso towards her, turning on the couch.

"What…" I prompt, lifting my chin – waiting, beckoning her. When she says nothing, I move closer; shuffle along the cushions. She's looking at my wearily, her head tilted out. I slide my hand along the cushion, creeping closer to her body. "What…" I ask again; quieter this time, lifting my head, nudging her to come closer. _Desperate._

_**Charlie**_

One kiss on his hand and I can taste him on my tongue now. It's even better, even _more_ than I can remember. It's so familiar. And it makes my heart drum faster in my chest. I watch him move in closer every second that I sit, my brain running over the detail of his skin against my tongue. And gradually, I let myself realise there's nothing I can or _want _to do about it. Like that devil in me just has to let it happen this time. As much as part of me wants to resist the likely agony, the heartache, another part of me longs to be back in his arms. Alone. Bare. He slides even closer. And still I don't move. His hand slides up onto my knee and holds it in his bony fingers. _Can he feel me shaking?_

"Brax…" I manage with a pant of air. But this time, he doesn't take it as a warning. And I don't think I meant him to.

"What…" he whispers, so close I can feel the heat in his words. I lick my lips, as if it was his tongue that had touched me then, not his words. The anticipation and longing rings in my ears. I swallow loudly, and open my mouth slightly to breathe the cool night air. Each breath out, tumbles from my quivering lips. The pressure is building in my chest - _possibility -_ my heart pounds harder, my body grows hotter under my uniform. We inch closer. He slides his hand along to my thigh, pressing down on it as he adjusts his body, using me to stable himself. I lick my lips once more, but mis-judge how close he has gotten, and my warm tongue briefly skids over his lip. We both freeze with the unexpected contact.

_**Brax**_

It felt so good. And it was only a second. Just how good means my jeans tighten beneath me again. It has been so long. Both of us are frozen after the moment of unintended indulgence. Our eyes still open, she looks at me, I search her. And then, it's as if it's a mutual agreement. Still watching each other, our heads tilt perfectly away and our jaws widen. Time slows. I can feel the warmth, the energy, pounding from her body under my hands, from her open mouth even before we touch. And as deeply as we have ever kissed, as passionate and raw as we have ever been, our mouths simply sink together, with a light groan from us both. The longing pays off. We kiss in the most honest way I know.

Her tongue plunges deep into my mouth. I suck her deep. Wanting more. Wet and writhing. I push it back between her lips with my tongue eager to feel her lips around me. I playfully brush the tip of mine across the roof of her soft lip and then turn my head the opposite way to do it again. This time though, she draws back a little, just to take a glance, just to take a breath of air from her open lips. Her shiny tongue dances at the front of her mouth as she does. I watch a smile grow at the corners of her lips. She closes her hands around my neck and holds me in place. Grinning now, she slides her long tongue out from the chasm of her mouth, and holding steady, paints my lips with the tip of her wet tongue. I stiffen with a smile, but let her continue to move in front of me. Seeing her plan, I open my mouth wider to catch her off guard and draw her close again. But she cunningly holds her position, holds my head firmer, and repeats the pattern with my bottom lip. Her tongue is so warm against my lip and leaves a trail of her warmth behind, on me.

I watch her draw her tongue back into her mouth, lick her own lips, as if sharing me with herself. I suck my bottom lip, tasting her. Then, she moves in slowly, and closes her mouth definitely around my bottom lip. She sucks it tight and dry, pulling back roughly. My bottom lip pings from her mouth. I grab a deep mouthful of air. Aroused completely.

_**Charlie**_

He pulls me from the neck back against his mouth. His lips still moist slide around mine easily. He flicks his tongue across my open mouth, licking me. It temps my tongue out automatically. But as soon as they have met together, he pulls back slightly. I open my eyes and see him watching me. At the same time, our tongues slide together in the gap. Between our open mouths, our tongues play; circling around each other, grazing up along the side, darting underneath and over each other. He pulls me closer in his arms. We lean up on the couch to be closer to one another, our mouths still playing. But now, our torso's tight and pressed firmly together.

Brax closes his mouth and smooches my lips together. We rip apart.

"Hi…" he whispers, planting another similar kiss over my mouth. I let his words sink into my skin, run through my brain.

"Hi…" I smile back. A reunion of sorts.

"Hi…" he repeats. His hands start to slide up and down my back. He does this with such force, such firmness in his broad hands that my shirt comes un-tucked. When he slides his hands up again, they fall under the fabric against my bare back. His fingers open, spreading instinctively wide. His head nuzzles to the side, brushes past my cheek, and he presses himself into my shoulder. His grip tightens around me, lifts me up against his torso tightly; just to be closer. His arms cross over each other and his hands slide to each side of my waist; his body so big, mine so little wrapped underneath him.

_**Brax**_

I've missed this. Us. I've missed holding her. Feeling her tiny figure beneath my hands. Knowing as I close my arms around her that it's her I can taste fresh on my lips, her tongue on mine. Thinking all this makes me hotter; makes me want her more. The need to be close to her is so much greater when we're this close. But I guess that's just how I work.

I slide my hands around and find the buttons on the bottom of her shirt. I slip them through the holes one by one. Gaining pace as I think about what's coming. When I can part the shirt up to her bra, I stop unbuttoning for a second, and spread my hands underneath the fabric, eager to be on her. I run my hands over her flat tensed stomach. She keeps kissing my open mouth as I do. I lean back to look at her, to see into her deep eyes and read her mind. She looks at me, nervously, I notice. I couldn't be further away from that feeling. I smile, nuzzle close and kiss her mouth warmly, so she knows it's me. That I'm right here. Back where we're supposed to be.

_**Charlie**_

He unbuttons my shirt and pushes his hands over my bare shoulders, encouraging the shirt to slip off my shoulders and down my arms. His warm hands cover my arms, following the shirt down. His mouth follows. His warm kisses thread a path down my shoulder and my arm, sucking my skin gently, grazing my flesh with his teeth. He runs his tongue along my body and across the front of my neck when he returns. My neck rolls back in ecstasy, letting his lips fall across my bare chest. The sensuality and emotion is so rare for us. It catches me off guard, unaware. He hears the groan break in my voice and in response, slides his hands up and around me, holding me close and tight. My head falls in, against his large shoulder. I roll my head into his neck, turning my nose, my open mouth against his skin. I breathe in deeply, his scent filling my senses, thrilling me. I'm quickly loosing myself in him, even so simply, like this.

And then, with his hands pressed against me so tightly, his palms flat against the surface of my skin and moving so quickly across every inch of my bare body, the barrier of his t-shirt is too much. From beneath his tight embrace, I reach to find the edges. When I clasp my hands around the seam, we lift it effortlessly over his head together. As he throws it away from us, my hands glide back down against his chest. His large arms come down around me again, and hold my tight up to his chest, encasing me in a cocoon of his body. Neither of us speak. We don't kiss. It's just his hands running across my back. Me tight in his embrace, under his warm touch. He slides me gently to one side in his arms, and I fold my hands neatly around his back and clutch him as he leans in to kiss me again.

_**Brax**_

I can't remember the last time it felt like this. I can't remember if it has ever felt like this? Is this the drink? _Or have I just waited for this for so long? _Her skin is like silk to touch. And I cant get enough of it – of her. My hands ache to be held against every inch of her skin. I can't stop following every inch of her naked body under my hands. I just want to feel her. To remind myself of who she is, her touch, her smell, her taste. It's overwhelming.

I roll us back onto the couch. She settles easily between my legs. I hold her between my thighs securely, so she can't escape again. I hold my arms around her, as she lies above me, taking advantage of being able to touch her; to be able to lie my hands right across her back. I slide my fingers up briefly underneath the thick strap of her bra, and then pull them back down. I slip into the arch of her back like a pool of water. I turn my hands against her, rolling the backs of my hand against the softest part that I know of her. And then delve only slightly into the waist band of her trousers. As I do, I feel her push herself down against my crotch, rock her hips back and forth over the bulge in my pants. She persists until she hears me grown and I am forced to break our kiss for air.

_**Charlie **_

"Charlie…" he pants. I can't help but smile. Loving that he's completely at my mercy. I hold his cheek in my hand. I run the pad of my thumb hard across his wet quivering bottom lip. I lean in and kiss his open mouth hard. We break away with a click. His hand holds me down against him with just his hand in the arch of my back. At the same time he urges his hips up against me and holds himself there so his long length presses up against me. As he does, my breath catches in my throat, and he watches me with careful eyes as I loose my nerve for just a second and give in to the moment of passion, bowing my head slightly. He holds himself tight, right there until I ride out the moment.

Just as his hips relax, his hands dart to the clasp on my bra and he breaks the straps free. He pulls it quickly from beneath me and it spins across the room. Not leaving a moment to spare, he pushes his hands underneath me. He closes both hands around each breast, and gently squeezes them tight around me. Instinctively, I urge myself down on him, and this time I watch as he grits his teeth, bears a quick smile, and lets his head roll back against the arm of the sofa. His thumbs press over my hardening nipples. He pinches them in his fingers briefly and I feel another urgent twinge between my legs. His hands leave me and find my waist. Before I realise his intentions, he hoists me further up his body and closes his hot mouth around my breast. His lips suck on my nipple. His tongue rolls back and forth over me, flicking and rubbing. He holds me up over him in strong firm hands. At the same time I hold myself down on his hardening cock, and I can't do anything but give into his pleasures.

_**Brax **_

Her tiny body grows heavy in my hands as I hold her above me, suckling on her soft rosy nipples. I kiss the well in her chest between her breasts, and then her neck as I bring her down to settle over me. She kisses my mouth as I do, and slips her hand down the front of my pants to wrap her hand around my warm length. Her fingers are cold, but tighten quickly around me. I slink down into the couch so she can reach all the way around me. She holds her hand still for a moment, and the warmth from me seeps into her cool palm. Then, watching my face, at an excrutiatingly slow pace, she pulls up towards us, letting every ripple curl out beneath her hand. The contact, just that one movement has my filling her fist more. I see a flicker of a smile on her cheeks. Accomplishment.

Moving out of eye sight, she slides her kisses to my neck. Her hand starts massaging underneath my boxers, gently at first. Tiny movements teasing out a bigger reaction from me. I pull up my knee so she has more room to work with, but clothes make it all so unsatisfying. Sensing this, the pace changes as she tugs at the buttons on my trousers. She eases me from the waistband, exposing me to the cool air and then wrapping her hand back around me. Now she can move freely, and does so with ease and passion. She whips her fist up and down with such speed that already my legs tense automatically. I slide my hand up her bare back and under her arm.

_**Charlie**_

He tips me back and we tumble off the couch. He breaks his own fall so he doesn't crush me, but lands perfectly over me instead. His strong arms hold his torso above me, whilst his naked waist presses down between my legs. All I can think, _it's hot_. His long length pressing against the crotch of my trousers, teasing. With a cheeky smile, he presses himself against me and even from under my trousers I can feel him warm and hard between my legs. He watches as my chest suddenly starts rising and falling quicker with anticipation in that moment. He leans far enough off me to quickly unbuckle my trousers and slide the waistband off each of my hips. His urgency means his hands slip and fail to pull them off quick enough. I lie useless beneath him, waiting for him to pull from me. I run my hands up his arms and down his long chest as far as I can reach (not far enough).

He finally succeeds, and pulls my clothes over my knees, and off one foot clumsily. Before they've been removed completely and at the first opportunity, he falls eagerly between my legs again. He draws his length up and down me using his hips, teasing once more. This time, with much less force. Both of us aware of how close we are to each other now. How one slip closer, one movement was the ultimate move. Right now though, we just relish in the potential of it all. I flick my eyes back up to his. He's already watching me. My breathing intensifies. I can feel him, gently stroking me. Both of us know what's next. He's just prolonging the inevitable. But I know I'm enjoying it just as much as he is.

_**Brax**_

_The way she looks at me. The rise and fall of her chest. The flutter of her eye lashes as she slowly blinks up at me. The heat between her legs flooding against my skin right now. _It's all just as I remember in one way, and all totally new in another.

Desperation and complete desire takes over inside me. I draw my hand down her side, slide over her hip and clutch her thigh in my hand. I widen her leg a little so I can slip further between her. I can hear her breathing heavily beneath me, nervously still. In response, I slide down closer to her, so my stomach slowly squashes down against her tiny figure. I twist my arm under her back and slide my hand up under her neck. My thumb strokes her skin for a moment as I look at her. She stares back at me, and her eyes soften with a hazy smile. It's all happened so quickly. It's all come down to this moment in a matter of minutes. And yet it feels like I have been planning it for so long.

She slides her arms around my back and hugs me close, bringing me down tighter over her. Our faces come together and I kiss her once, lightly on the mouth. I hold open her leg again with my hand, and position my hips slightly above hers. I stroke myself once more up and down over her soft skin before I let myself lead the way, instinct taking over.

_**Charlie**_

As he pushes inside me for the first time, he catches my breath. Like I wasn't ready. Like even now, tight underneath him, I was caught off guard by his immeasurable size and positioning. His angle, his force, his persistence, threads a path right though me. Right to my heart. My head pounds with blood and I have to hold my eyes shut tight as he continues to force himself deeper, like it will never end. When he finally stills and draws back with a slight jerk, only then can a moan rumble from my throat.

His hand never moves from my thigh, but twists around underneath my limp leg holding it up as he pushes down into me again. I roll my hips up. He likes the adjustment and slips down more easily. Recovering slightly, I open my eyes to find him pushing himself up on one arm, rising rapidly above me. His jaw is ajar, locked. A look of utter concentration is plastered across his face. It makes me weak to watch him loosing himself. At the same time, I can barely catch my breath again.

_**Brax**_

She's so tight I can barely move. I work to make it easier, but her opening, fitted so neatly around me, is having such an effect that I can barely cope to move. I clutch her leg and hold it around me, like a buckle around my waist. I hold myself up over her, and let my hips begin to do the work. I rock myself inside her, gently at first. She moves with me. Me rocking her body. We move together in unison, my cock deep inside her.

It becomes easier. I can feel her warmth beginning to ooze around me. I let out a groan of air, of release as I feel her body giving way for me. I can slide more easily now, and take full advantage. I draw out of her half way, slowly and gradually and then thrust hard back inside her. Perhaps too hard. She grimaces in agony, squirming underneath me. I pause from deep inside her. But she recovers and bangs her hips up instinctively to meet mine. Our bodies bang against each other, out of sync but full of desire for just a second. I steady her with a hand, and with one quick movement, slide out and into her again. Again, she shudders beneath me. This one simple move almost too much for her to take.

_**Charlie**_

I could stay like this for hours. Well, I wouldn't make it for hours, neither would he…but feeling him inside me was something I am just used to. And could happily put up with for hours. But I know him. And I know what he likes. How he likes it.

"Wait." I say, placing my hands flat on his chest.

"Wh-at?" he pants, unamused and perplexed. I lick my lips moist, watch him as I do. Let him wait. I push my thigh against his hand until he let's go and let my leg fall open. He slides deeper, caught off guard, and grimaces from the shift. He falls down over me.

"Let me ride you." I say, my lips fluttering against his soft cheek.

_**Brax**_

We escape to my room. It feels quieter in here. It's dark too. Except for the light from outside softly shining in from the open window. I've led us here, naked, her hand in mine. I stop at the side of the bed. I turn back to her, ready to embrace her. I hold her hips in my hands and we stumble back until the bed is behind me. Charlie pushes me back. I comply, falling back into the flat cushions. As I do, she straddles me. Her body rises tall above me, as I slink back.

The few minutes from the living room to the bedroom have been long. And as her warm, wet opening comes into contact with the tip of my cock again it's even more exciting. Like my body can remember from just seconds ago, and wants to pick up exactly where we left off. But now it's different. Now she's in control. Of everything. Every movement, every shift, every unexpected buckle. With every effort to tease her down onto me, I slide myself slightly inside her opening. But gravity forces me to pull back. We're apart again. The knowledge of being inside her disappearing into the darkness.

_**Charlie**_

He's like a block of cold air beneath me, waiting to slide hard between my legs and fill me again. I position myself over him, hold my opening against the tip of his cock. I tremble above him as I wait. He moves up and briefly slides between my lips before he drops back. I smile. I let us linger apart for a second longer. Our eyes never loose their lock. Anticipation. I lean down, and drop down on him slightly. He enters me a little more than last time. But I pull back before either of us have chance to enjoy it. He groans. His hands find my hips; a new tactic. But I resist. I waver above him, waiting. _For what. _

And then, as hard as he thrust into me before, I plunge down over him with vigour and fury. I sit down completely over him. And unlike before, he sinks deep inside me in seconds. So quickly that it feels like he can't possibly fill me like he had before. There's no friction, no tension. He tenses beneath me instantly. His legs rise up slightly behind me. Every muscle in his chest convulges. As I sit on him, only then can I feel the full size of him expand inside me. It catches my breath, I urge myself down around him, press him to every space inside me.

Eventually, I lift myself, somehow, with trembling thighs, and then let every muscle in my body go weak as I rush down around him again. His hands grip my thighs, just above the knee. I open my legs wider, and can't help but let my hips thrust forward uncontrollably whilst he is inside me. He groans out loud this time, and digs his fingers into me. No chance of regaining any control now. He holds my bare body as I rock him into me deeper, rhythmically, not letting up. With a deep moan winding from my shaky voice, I am forced to arch into him a little, bending my back into a long curve. This is how it had to be. Him between my legs. Him inside me. Me in control.

_**Brax**_

It's an agony I can't begin to describe. Watching the woman you love sit comfortably over you, thrusting wildly, making you move inside them. Holding you within their body, between their legs. Knowing which slight movement meant you seeped even deeper into a dark tight unknown world.

I find her hands and entwine our fingers together. We clench our hands around one another tightly. I can feel my pulse, her pulse, blend as one. I can feel every moan that trickles from her throat each time she jolts forward on me now. It doesn't matter how small the movement she makes, each one feels bigger than the last. The pressure builds between us, under us. She rides through every second. Persevering. Pursuing the agony.

It comes to feel that I can't go any further; that any more, and I will burst. I lean up and she stills, unable to move as she was, now I've closed the gap between us. I link my arms around her, and we slide back onto the bed behind her, me stretched out above her once more.

_**Charlie**_

"Come inside me." I hear myself say, lost in the heat of the moment. I search his eyes, urging him on. He hears me, I can see it in front of me. He lets his kiss hover before he places it on my open mouth. As he draws back, I can see the sense, the thought, the concentration in his mind. Whereas I am lost – in us.

Currently unsatisfied, empty, from him, I lean up to find his hard length. But he holds himself away. He slides a stern hand down my stomach and between my parted, swollen lips. He presses his fingers between them and briefly slips two wide fingers into me. He pulls them back all too soon, wet and warm from me, from us, and surrounds my clit with large swooping swirls. I can feel him, see his eyes watching me, waiting for my response. He knows the response coming. He teases it out.

I cant help but let out a moan with delight as he twists another large circle around me. My whole body stiffens beneath him, and already aroused, the contact makes me shudder underneath him. He spins his fingers around me in the opposite direction; turning and turning the same circle against my round pounding clit, faster now, waiting for a similar response. I grind my teeth tight, and feel the build of pressure, which releases itself as another shudder. With intent, his fingers dip into my opening again. Soft again, his fingers nuzzle down on one side of my clit, slipping with moisture between the folds of skin. He tickles the spot underneath. I freeze and hold myself still as he does. My jaw, stiff, opens slightly as the silent moan hovers on my lips. I revel in the build up of tension that forms from my stomach down.

_**Brax**_

I can tell exactly when she likes it. I know exactly where. But I can also tell from the way her body solidifies under mine. I can tell from the sound of the air being pushed from her throat. From the way her mouth parts slightly, hovers, her writhing tongue wriggling in her mouth. I can tell from the way her eyes flutter under her heavy lids. And I can tell from the way her clit ticks under my fingers, and her lips drip with moisture.

In a few seconds, she has drifted into that place I love to send her. Eager to follow, I pull back my fingers, slide closer and line my cock before her. I slowly push up inside her. I slide myself into every corner of her long dark opening, feeling my way like I imagine a snake does along a sandy ground. Only when I'm completely encased by her, do I roll over her body completely, tuck my arms underneath her, and begin to run up and down inside her.

The soft stroke of the inside of her walls is a delicate tease that my cock enjoys being tormented by. Within seconds of moving inside, I can feel the familiar rise of pressure. I can feel her tightening underneath me as my own body, my position, means that I rub against her throbbing clit. I move faster, pressing down harder on her tiny body. She lies, lifeless beneath me, but for the rock of her body in unison with mine. As I move up inside her, she moves with me. At the top, I hold myself inside her, deep, drawn out, completely still. We pause, our eyes locked together, a test of strength, of staying power. Her lips part a little more, her eyes flutter as she tries with all her might to maintain her poise. But still holding myself up inside her, I jostle to the left, and she groans and instinctively shudders again. I kiss her open mouth when she isn't looking. She can only gasp, restless, against my mouth.

_**Charlie**_

I want to come. I will come. But not yet.

He slinks back, sliding down from inside me again. This is just as much torment to me. Even the drawing back movement of his pulsing cock inside me makes me shudder. I can't get enough. I can't possibly 'feel' him any more than right now. His lips touch my mouth and I can't find the brain function to move my lips back in unison. He kisses my lips, sucks the chapped lines. I feel his teeth scrape across by bottom lip. A groan escapes my mouth, and gets lost in his.

He soars up inside me again. The pressure of this angle against my clit a torment that runs through my core. When far inside me, he wriggles back and forth for a moment. The tiny thrusts banging against my clit. I would cry out if I could. But his mouth holds me tight. Silences me.

_**Brax**_

"Come-" I tell her. I kiss her whole mouth again. Devour it.

"Mm-h." She writhes underneath me, bearing down against me.

"Co-ome." I tease her, my words hollow in her open mouth. I breathe against her wide lips, knowing the effect this is having. She's silent. Concentration. Lack of control. Nothingness. But us.

With a suddenness, I pull back and thrust up inside her. And again. A change in pace. A long moan winds from her voice. Shaky. Uncontrollable, not like her. Once more, I plummet deep inside her and hold myself tight against her walls, against her clit, against her whole body. I keep the pressure. I bear down on her. I can see her lost in that silent world of pleasure. But she's relentless.

From nowhere, her arms creep up around my waist and her tiny hands still on my sides. She opens her eyes from their lost world. She licks her lips with her darting tongue. I sense a new challenge. She has initiated it. I retrieve my hands, and help her pull her legs tight around my back. She holds them in place. I watch as she controls the waves of pleasure tempting her to give in as I shift and move within her. She's tetering on the edge. And as her legs lock around me, and she holds me in place within her, I know I am.

_**Charlie**_

He can't escape from here. And when he starts moving up and down inside me, we can both revel in the joy of being able to move completely together and not risk a potential break in rhythm or space. Neither of us can escape now.

It's a change, to reach the end. And it's well rehearsed; well practiced. We know how it works. And we have it down to an art. As we begin the race to the finish, I know that Brax has so much more potential for velocity from this position. That he can begin to wildly, passionately, overpoweringly, thrust inside me, without me moving underneath him. Because wrapped around him tightly, I'm completely his.

And as he does begin to loose himself a little more with each thrust, with each groan, I cling to him so he can ride out each and every instinct, each jolt, each untrained inch, inside me. His movements begin to loose intent and positioning. Before long, he is consumed by the movements. Thrusting up against me with no accuracy. It's unplanned, uncontainable. The energy, the heat, it burns between us. He grinds it out within me.

I tighten my legs around him and as I do, he plunges up, with little room to maneuver. I feel him tense before the warm spill begins, his whole large frame jerking as he unfolds inside me. He leans his forehead against my shoulder. Still emptying himself, still reeling, he thrusts inside me again riding out every wave of pleasure.

_**Brax**_

I reach between our hot, sweat-ridden bodies with one hand. The warmth becomes moisture as I find her clit. With all the speed and energy I can find, I ravage her. Pushing down on her hard before leaning back with my fingers, and tapping her rhythmically but with no pattern. She moans instantly as I start, stiffens under my body, curves against me and within seconds of my fingers turning over the same spot, her back spasms into an arch and she flexes beneath me. Her winding orgasm continues as mine ends. I flick and roll my fingers against the tiny twitches her body makes under them, hoping to prolong it for her. Every contraction she makes, I'm sure, was only a minute glimpse of what she was actually feeling. I know the exact feeling - I slide out of her, when she finally stills beneath me.

I roll onto my back next to her. Her legs flop to the side over mine. We lie, staring at the ceiling, arms above our heads almost; spent.

For a long time, I can only hear her heavy breathing. Her short, raspy breaths as she gasps for air. My heart thuds in my chest, only now coming to terms with the many minutes of blood-filled, intense passion. I slide my head onto the side, to look at her. She turns hers to meet my gaze. Clearly, neither of us can speak yet. But I can just watch her instead.

_**Charlie**_

It has been a long time. Well, it feels like it has been a long time. But now, I feel warm and fulfilled. Like it never ended. Or maybe as if everything that was missing, is back? Perhaps it can be now. Or perhaps this was just what needed to happen. Something that had built up from nothing, to an absolute need that had to be satisfied right there and then. I turn away, confused, looking back up at the ceiling. Even now I have no answers. Would I ever get them? I can feel his eyes on me still though, figuring me out. Trying to, at least.

When I'm with him, like this, it's everything. It's all I need, and all I can cope with. It's intoxicating and brilliant. Why is all the rest so difficult?

"Charlie…" I turn back to him slowly. My mind is gradually twisting back into reality. How drunk is he still? He stares back at me, as if he has forgotten his words. I wait. Intrigued.

_**Brax**_

The reality of us both lying next to each other, exhausted, but bare, and naked, suddenly becomes too much. I push my hand slightly further towards her, and slip it into her open palm. Instinctively, she closes her smaller fingers around mine, as far as they will go.

"Stay." I ask.

_**Charlie**_

I swallow, hard. It's not what we do. But he knows that. So many nights have we lay like this, wherever we might be, and in our own informed and assertive manner have reasoned our way out of sleepovers – _I have reasoned my way out of sleepovers_. He isn't convincing me though. He is barely asking. He's speaking the words I want to say myself.

_**Brax**_

She turns her head first. Her beautiful blue eyes enchant me. I can't draw myself away from them, even as she turns towards me. Her whole body slides silently to her side, before she shuffles up in her foetal position into my side.

Sighing, with more relief than anything,I throw my arm around her and pull her tightly into my side. She places one hand on my chest, and her head settles into the crook of my arm. I kiss her forehead. And I close my eyes. Hoping that this is it, that this can be it…


End file.
